People don't care how much you know unless they know how much you care. Building and sustaining healthy relationships is like putting together a 1000 piece puzzle
Larry Lukens, sales expert, successful business owner and servant leader opens his presentation with this question, “If given the choice, would you rather be sold to or engaged in an authentic, caring conversation?” In this presentation, Larry focuses on the importance of asking questions that are want-based so that you understand the puzzle of challenges your prospects are facing and how to help. He starts out with the four corners of want-based selling:
- Knowing how to ask the right questions
- Knowing the long-term benefits of asking the right questions
- How the closing starts with the opening
- Understanding wants versus needs
Using a real-time case study to highlight questions that make a consumer aware of what they don’t know what they don’t know, Larry focuses on:
- Engaging in conversation and asking questions about why someone started their business and challenges they face
- How to create win/win because every ethical sale provides a solution to what a customer wants
- Criteria for asking the right questions
- Why listening twice as much as you talk is an important guideline to follow
- Understanding the benefits of want-based selling because it is the foundation for productive long-term relationships
Takeaways of this presentation include how to open strong, asking the right questions to build authentic rapport, and remembering the important distinctions between appealing to wants vs. needs. Larry Lukens helps you learn what questions to ask yourself and others in order to have productive conversations that help everyone involved.
According to Mayo clinic and John Hopkins University, unrelenting stress harms our bodies. We all know that, yet we let it continue each day.
Have you ever heard the saying, “Slow down, stop and smell the roses? “ This was something I always heard from my mother-in-law at every visit for over twenty years. I always thought, “What does she know? She should mind her own business. I’m doing the best I can.” Holly and I owned three 24-hour restaurants. Our children were all active in school and sports. Holly and I wanted to do our best for them. Many would say our family was living the American dream. However, there never seem to be enough hours in the day.
It was the fall of 1997 when I received a call from the basketball coach. It was the first day of basketball practice and Landon didn’t show. Both Landon and Chad had been playing organized basketball from the third grade. Chad was a junior and he made it to practice. The coach wanted to know why Landon hadn’t arrived. I said I didn’t know. But I would ask when he came home. When Landon came home, I asked why he didn’t show for practice. He said, “Dad do you think I’ll ever play professional basketball? I said, “No.” Landon said, “Do you think I would ever get a college scholarship?” I said, “I doubt it, but maybe.” Landon then said, “Dad, I would rather go deer hunting.” What could I say? I could tell he had given this a lot of thought. I reluctantly said, “OK.” I’m so thankful I respected my son’s wishes. On December 17, he died in a car accident.
Now fast-forward to Thanksgiving Day, 1998. I started work early so I could arrive home early to have our family Thanksgiving dinner at 4 o’clock. We gave thanks and ate our meal. Then, I retired to my chair and fell asleep. When I woke up two hours later I asked Holly, “Where did everyone go?” She said, “They left. You were sleeping.” This was my “aha” moment. I did not want to be remembered as always being asleep in my chair. I realized things had to change. I had been using my margin (how I use time) just to get by. The only way to improve my margin would to get rid of the clutter (spending time on things that don’t matter) in my life. I am thankful for the margin I now have and would like to share the benefits of “slowing down and stopping to smell the roses.”
“Four benefits of putting margin in your life”
When you’re not hurrying and worrying all the time, you have time to think. Less hurrying and worrying means more time to relax, more time to enjoy life, and more time to stop and smell the roses.
- Better health
When you’re not pushing your limits, you have less stress. According to studies by Mayo clinic and John Hopkins University, unrelenting stress harms our bodies. We all know that, yet we let it continue day after day. Many times the only margin time in our lives is when a heart attack almost happens or does. Why do we wait until our health plummets before we make a new choice? The truth is our bodies need downtime to heal. Racecars make pit stops in order to get repaired. You can’t fix anything going 200 miles an hour. Yet we try to be repaired while we’re still racing through life. Margin builds in time for better health.
- Stronger relationships
Relationships take time, and margin provides the time to sit and talk, to listen and enjoy one another, and to provide the comfort we each need. When we don’t make relationships a priority and make time for each other, our relationships suffer.
- Leaving a legacy
Prioritize your life. How do you want to be remembered?
I am thankful to my mother in law Margaret Hillstrand (8/11/1920-8/29/2012) and her persistence in helping me to “Slow down and stop to smell the roses”.
Psalm 90:12 (The Living Bible) Teach us to number our days and recognize how few they are; help us to spend them as we should.
Larry Lukens is a successful businessman and spiritual expert in the e4e community who uses his life experience to bring comfort and counsel. To contact Larry, call him at 740.294.9740 or write him at email@example.com.
Specializing in spiritual growth, successful business owner and leader Larry Lukens provides practical tips for overcoming adversity and using it to grow. He shares the following wisdom to help us:
- Expect and find value in adversity, which comes to all of us
- Remain peaceful when dreams turn into nightmares
- Draw upon faith for healing and wisdom
- Leverage faith as a pathway to greater love, blessings and happiness
- Recognize and benefit from seven key lessons that arise from adversity
- Engage in five strategies to use daily for continued spiritual growth
Larry Lukens is a successful businessman who uses his life experience to bring comfort and counsel. To contact Larry, call him at 740.294.9740 or write him at firstname.lastname@example.org.
We all have the same amount of time every day. We choose to invest it, or waste it.
“Everything in our lives, all of our pursuits, should be founded upon our answer to the question why—why we exist, followed by why we do what we do.” – Todd Gongwer- Lead…..For God’s Sake
Why do we go on vacations? I would go on vacations to enjoy life for a while, to relax, create memories and, be with my family. It was important for Holly and I to create memories of family vacations we had as children. We would then decide for the time and money we had, where could we go. We would determine the must see sights. We always wanted to get the most out of vacation. When our vacation was over, we did not want to regret not seeing or doing something. We wanted to get the most out of our one-week together.
Our life is like our vacations in several ways. I would like to share two. The first is when it’s over will you have regrets for something you wished you would’ve done? The second is, sometimes vacations don’t go as they are planned and sometimes our lives do not go as we planned.
What does the Bible say about your life not going as you planned?
Trials and Temptations-James 1:2-8
2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. 6 But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7 That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. 8 Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.
As stated above we should pray with all of our heart for wisdom or we should not expect to receive it.
I like the Serenity Prayer.
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
We all have the same amount of time every day. We choose to invest it, or waste it.
lm 90:12 - Teach us to make the most of our time, so that we may grow in wisdom. Until I prioritized what’s important to me- I felt stressed, not blessed. Pray for wisdom to understand why we exist, and why we do what we do. Wisdom allows you to make the most of your time and be at peace when your life doesn’t always go as you planned.
Our family had suffered through life changing sicknesses, financial issues, family member addiction, and loss of our baby. Then twelve years later on December 17, 1997, our 16-year old son was killed in a car accident.
Until the time we lost Landon in the accident, I faced life’s challenges with an awareness of God, but little faith. Up until this time, I believed “things” happen and you just had to be tough. After a year of struggling with Landon’s death, I came to a fork in the road. My faith would either grow or go to hell. My faith has strengthened. I would like to share how.
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."
Martin Luther King Jr. (1929-1968)
I was raised by two hardworking and loving parents who taught me I could be anything I wanted. In 1974, fate led me to the love of my life, Holly. For the next 10 years, everything was picture-perfect. We began a family in 1977, built our dream home in 1978, and by 1985, our family consisted of four boys and a girl. I owned and operated three family restaurants and five muffler shops with my brother. All of my hard work had paid off, and I was living the American dream.
On August 13, 1985, we lost our infant son, which was very difficult, especially for my wife. In 1990, my brother and I had gone our separate ways in the business By 1993, our oldest son began to struggle with drug addiction. The year 1995, our city began a 19-month road project that resulted in our business dropping in half. December 17, 1997, our son Landon was killed in a car accident. In 1998, our oldest son was faced with eight years of prison due to his continued struggle with addiction. In 2000, my father passed before his time, falling victim to surgical mistakes.
"Our American dream was becoming our American nightmare. Why was this happening?"
For years, I struggled not understanding why all the turmoil. My belief I could be anything I wanted and I had control over my life was shattered. I had no control over what was happening. Our American dream had become our American nightmare. Why was this happening?
After a year of struggling with our second son’s death, a friend of mine wrote, “Larry, if Landon could talk to you now, what would he say? He would say,” Dad get your head out of your butt, take care of Mom, my brothers and my sister, and I’ll see you someday.” At that point I had a choice. My faith would either grow or it would go to hell. Luckily for me and my family, my faith grew.
Fast-forward to May 28, 2010—the day I suffered a stroke that paralyzed my left side. I laid in bed thinking, “Why me? What Now?” Through this stroke, I have been blessed with an understanding of patience and persistence. I walk carefully, and currently type with one hand. However, I am working full time, and life is good! I have been blessed to share my story with others, and this is what I believe:
Proverbs 16:9. “We make our plans, but the Lord guides our steps.” With each of these life challenges, I have been given an opportunity. I have been blessed with a wonderful family and love of my wife of 38 years. My three amazing children have all been blessed with their soul mates, and I have 5 wonderful grandchildren.
Life’s challenges have blessed me with an understanding of the importance of faith, family and friends. It is through faith we receive the gift of hope. It’s by faith our challenges can become opportunities. I would add to Dr. King’s quote to say, “The bigger the challenge the bigger the opportunity.”